Jake Pavelka toured the hometowns and met the families of his remaining four women on The Bachelor last night. From New York to Oregon, everything went well.

Until Ali Fedotowsky dropped the biggest bombshell in Bachelor history, that is. Well, except for last summer on The Bachelorette when the same thing happened.

The story editors really need to step it up. As always, THG endured Jake’s trials and tribulations on The Bachelor to recap the action in our exclusive point system:

Gia Allemand says Jake’s unlike anyone she’s dated. Yup, he’s that dull. Minus 3.

Erick, Gia’s brother, is like a poor man’s Pauly D from Jersey Shore. Plus 4.

Gia confesses was with a “bad guy” who cheated on her with all her friends. Wow, so Carl Pavano is not only wildly overpaid, he’s a complete jackass. Minus 7.

Jake pretends to deliberate while looking at pictures from ABC.com.

Visiting New England in the late fall, Jake tells Ali that it comes to cold, “I’m a big baby.” Replace “cold” with just about anything and that would be true. Plus 5.

Ali decides poor Jake to … her dead grandmother’s empty house. To borrow one of the simplest, but most profound Liz Lemon quotes: “Dealbreaker!” Minus 3.

Ali’s mom says she Googled Jake. THG ranks #1 when one does this. Plus 30.

Jake to Tenley: “I run everything I do by my parents.” Groan. Minus 8.

Jake to Tenley: “You have to be a we.” Swoon. Plus 9.

Tenley choreographs a ballet dance for Jake set to a traditional wedding march. We can’t decide if genuine cuteness trumps extreme awkwardness, so … Even.

Jake asks Tenley’s dad for his blessing – while dating three other girls – and gets it! Why? Because he’s “a man of integrity.” On The Bachelor. LOL. Minus 48.

Farewell, Ali Fedotowsky … or will you return?

For once, Vienna Girardi was not the focal point of the entire episode. Plus 12 for that, but an obligatory Minus 7 because her dad has some major screws loose.

The “bombshell” is Ali Fedotowsky going all Ed Swiderski on Jake Pavelka’s Jillian Harris. She’s gotta go back to work! Minus 100 for the absurd hype this got.

But Plus 86 for Ali crying in the hallway; Jake leaning over the banister. Ali pulling out of the rose ceremony, and Jake’s remark: “All I have right now is hope.”

While it’s rather lame of Ali to up and leave, she probably made the right choice. Jake is pretty lame, and it’s hard to get a new job in this economy. Plus 24.

In the promo for next week, the phone rings and it’s … Ali! Who would have guessed? Oh wait, us. Since this already happened on The Bachelorette. Minus 8.

TOTAL: -12. SEASON: +1. Roses: Tenley, Gia, Vienna. Gone: Ali … or is she?!

Who should Jake Pavelka give his final rose to?

Not long after Dr. Conrady Murray was charged with involuntary manslaughter today, those close to Michaej Jackson – whose death the physician is suspected to have been responsible for – reacted in outrage.

“He’s a monster,” said MJ’s mother, Katherine (pictured), after the arraignment.

Brian Oxman, the family’s veteran lawyer for Jackson’s father Joseph, was equally disgusted with the judge’s decision.

“This charge is a slap on the wrist,” he said. “There’s great disappointment here. [Conrad Murray] should’ve been charged with a higher degree of responsibility. What he did was reckless. It was a disregard for human life.”

Michael’s sister Latoya also chimed in, putting everything in a disturbing context:

“Michael was murdered and although he died at the hands of Dr. Conrad Murray, I believe Dr. Murray was a part of a much larger plan. There are other individuals involved and I will not rest and I will continue to fight until all of the proper individuals are brought forth and justice is served.”

She was one of thousands when she auditioned for American Idol in Boston, but Siobhan Magnus is one of the few remaining.

The Massachusetts native is rumored to be one of this season’s 24 semifinalists, as she’ll be featured in Hollywood starting this week.

Not much is known about the 19-year old: she sings lead vocals for the band Lunar Valve; is actually a glass-blowing apprentice and loves horror movies.

Siobhan resides in in Cape Code, Massacusetts.

In the video below, watch Magnus take the stage in a production of “Beauty and the Beast.”

I’m not exactly sure what Megan Fox is selling in this commercial, but whatever it is, I’ll take ten. Assuming the bath water is included. Bottoms up!

Screen caps:

This is hilarious:

Less than a week after Alex Reid tied the knot with Katie Price, the cage fighter reportedly wants out. The reason? He had no idea he was flying to Las Vegas to get married!

Sources claim Reid’s advisors are searching for a legal loophole that will enable him to annul the marriage: “He feels he was pressured and hadn’t had time to consider all the implications,” an insider said.

Alex Reid has a good body. Good taste in women? Not so much.

The story gets even better:

A spokesperson for Price, whose marriage to Peter Andre fell apart amidst a series of tabloid accusations, said his client and Reid did plan on getting hitched… but Price organized the event while Reid was secluded in the Celebrity Big Brother house.

“Alex and Kate had always intended to get married, but the Vegas trip was spontaneous and Alex didn’t know about it,” the rep said.

A friend says Reid was drunk for the Vegas ceremony, “which could have clouded his thoughts.” That still doesn’t explain what he sees in Price to begin with, of course.

This is an attention-starved same woman, after all, that made up a story about a celebrity raping her. Seriously.

No one on the planet is thankful for the existence of Dr. Conrad Murray… but if anyone could find a silver lining in that physician’s involvement in Michael Jackson’s death, it’s Charlie Sheen.

That’s because Murray’s arraignment today on charges of involuntary manslaughter overshadowed the fact that Sheen was also in court.

As a result of his Christmas Day confrontation with wife Brooke Mueller, the actor was charged with three crimes in an Aspen court: felony menacing, misdemeanor third degree assault and misdemeanor criminal mischief.

Sheen did not enter a plea.

The judge did relax the protective order that has been in place against Charlie since December 25; he can now communicate and have contact with Mueller.

The couple embraced each other at the conclusion of the hearing and Sheen is due back in court in March.

In a follow-up to a story we posted earlier today, Conrad Murray has been officially charged with involuntary manslaughter and has entered a plea of not guilty.

The documents were filed in court today by the Los Angeles District Attorney, who alleges Murray “did unlawfully, and without malice, kill Michael Joseph Jackson.” Those are haunting words just to read, aren’t they?

Meanwhile, the county coroner released his official findings at the hearing and there’s no doubt about it: a lethal dosage of Propofol killed the singer. Eleven vials of the drug were found in Jackson’s home, and none of had prescription directions, patient or doctor names.

According to the coroner’s report, obtained by TMZ, homicide is cited as the cause of death because…

1. The setting of Jackson’s bedroom (e.g.  a chair alongside the bed) indicate the drugs were not self-administered.
2. Propofol was injected in a non-hospital setting, without any appropriate medical indication.
3. Suggested equipment for patient monitoring, precision dosing and resuscitation were not present.

After the DA originally asked for bail to be set at $300,000, the judge set it at $75,000. He forced Murray to hand over his passport and decreed that the doctor cannot be in possession of, or prescribe, anesthetics.

If Murray is found guilty, he’ll face a maximum of four years in prison.

Even if he’s acquitted of these criminal charges, the family can sue Murray for millions, according to Bill Newkirk, a lawyer who specializes inmedical malpractice.

“This is absolutely a slam-dunk malpractice case simply because of the alleged use of propofol. If the drug was indeed in his system, no competent doctor could justify why it was used. You can bet the Jackson family will be filing a civil claim soon against any doctors implicated in Jackson’s medical care.”

On tomorrow night’s broadcast, Ellen DeGeneres officially joins the American Idol judging table.

While we’re looking forward to this debut, many viewers are already contemplating next season. Still shocked by the news of Simon Cowell’s exit, they’re left to wonder: who will replace this British icon?

Howard Stern has an idea: himself!

“I can’t imagine anyone else but me replacing [Cowell],” Stern said today. “How else are they going to make that show work? Who knows how to broadcast and who knows how to be interesting? And who’s not afraid to speak their mind?”

All good questions, but surely there’s someone out there that’s outspoken and more knowledgeable about music than he is about lesbians or sex toys.

Stern says quite clearly he’d do the show… if the money is right.

“It might be possible, we’ll see,” he said. “They’d have to pay me a ton of dough, because I already make a ton of dough.”

Stern’s five-year, $500 million contract with Sirius radio expires at the end of this year. Do you think he’d make a suitable replacement for Simon?